Y&R Recap: Thursday, July 23rd, 2009

Better late than never! Right y’all? Today’s recap is being brought to you by Nosy Nelly aka Nikki Newman

Yeah, y’all, Nikki finally let the cat out of the bag that Victor Jr. is a closeted gay man. Like father like son, because we all know old Victor has been holding a torch for Jack Abbott for decades.

Nikki can’t hold water, so she was dying to spill the beans to Heather, too. Heather wasn’t trying to hear it though. Your bad Heather, your bad. Don’t be mad at Nikki when you find out your man is living on the Down Low. Step Mommy tried to warn you.

See guys, Heather has a hard head. She’ll obviously have to learn the hard way.

Oops, close call Heather and Rafe. One booty call is leaving, just as the other is arriving, Adumb will not be happy about this. Rafe, know your role. You are the side piece. You are not to approach the main chick, ever. Stunts like this will get you dumped.

See, what did I tell you? Rafe, playas don’t like to be kept on a leash. And you my man, were getting way too clingy. HO, you stepped out of line, and Adumb had to teach a lesson. Now be gone, and try to hold on to the little dignity you have left.

Victor knows what it’s like to love a man, which is why he took his son’s outing all in stride. Well played Mustache, well played.

Over on the other side of town…

Billy is trying to set up a booty call with Mac, but she busy setting her new boo up, in her old boo’s crib. Mac, girlfriend, you have some playa skills. It takes a bold bitch to hide out her new man in her current man’s house, especially when current boo hates new boo’s guts. Well played, playa.

Well actually, perhaps it wasn’t so well played. Billy confronted his faux bro, and oddly, Assby got his lie on to protect Mac, while Billy said the only person who mattered was Lily. Maria, girlfirend, I think you’re confused. This should be the other way around.

It takes a playa to spot a playa, so next Billy confronts Mac about her fail playa skills, and asks her if she’s tappin’ Outback Assby. Mac goes with the first rule of being a playa, deny, deny, deny. Keep on playing, playas.

Meanwhile on minority row…

Neil and Devon are hella excited b/c they haven’t had this much screen time since…never. They try to convince Lily to go ahead with her spaying, and ditch her lady parts, b/c hell, they don’t want her polluting the Winters bloodline with Assby genes. Lily isn’t not feeling it though.

As evidenced by her decision to leave the hospital to find her man. Oh Lily, girl you so crazy.

Back at Mac’s bar…

Billy is surprised to see Lily at the bar. Hey BA, other people besides you like to get their mid afternoon drank on. The girl is dying, why don’t you order her one of those scotch neats you’re always sipping on. I think she might like that.

Awww, lookie here. BA hates Assby’s guts, but he’s still willing to go find his ass for Lily. How nice, Assby can’t bring himself to even go hide out in the hospital chapel, and wait for Lily. Yet Billy is willing to do something for her that he’d rather poke his eye out than do. Who’s really the PAB in this situation?

Next on the Young and the Restless…