Y&R Recap Wednesday, June 24th 2009

Today’s recap is being brought to us by Abby and her fierce hair…

We don’t get to see this fabulous bitch often, but when we do, Abby always comes in talking the truth. Today Fab-by was doing a photo shoot at notVogue, and took a moment out of her busy schedule to tell her mother straight up that Adam is the one causing all the trouble at Ye Olde Newman Ranch. But of course, Ashley wouldn’t hear of anyone speaking ill of her new best friend. So I guess that means we’re up for a summer of shenanigans at the Ranch.

Noah told Eden about his emancipation plans, and…this happened. I think I just threw up. In my mouth.

I think this newest issue of notVogue has something to do with families, so Aunt Abby and Nephew Noah are in the shoot together, wearing…that. Even the extra can’t believe this get up. Seriously? Kelly green shorts that are smedium, and a fuchsia tie that is smedium, and a blazer that is…smedium? I think you get the idea.

Noah shares his plans to divorce his parents with Aunt Abby, and she immediately assumes that Eden put him up to this. Fab-by rightly tells Noah that this emancipation idea is stupid. Noah already lives away from his parents, so what’s the need to make it official?

Noah’s not trying to hear it though, and tells Fab-by to get to stepping.

Across town with the Scooby Gang…

Jana is still in jail, water is still wet, and the sky is still blue. MAB should just go all GH, and make the Fisher/Baldwins the mob family that they appear to secretly yearn to be.

Amber and Daniel are trying to figure out who’s behind the art scam. Daniel says maybe it’s Alex, and Amber wants to know who is that. Well Amber…

Yeah, Alex is a guy that Daniel and Kevin hired to attack Lily. Dude took it too far, and drugged her, almost raping her and killing her. Yeah. You’ve got yourself a real winner there Amber. People say Lily dipped out on Daniel quickly after the porn, but hey, girlfriend did forgive him for Alex. Enough said.

Kevin apparently gave a motivational speech at a high school, and the kids loved it. Timeout. Let us not forget that Kevin is a ‘reformed’ pedophile, Lily had the std to prove it. He should be required to keep a 50 foot distance from all schools. I’m just saying. It even looked like he was giving the girls blue steel. Where’s Pedobear when you need him?

Oh, here he is…

Meanwhile…

Kevin was busy with the kiddies, so Amber decided to do a little research. She’s thinking that maybe the person behind this art scam isn’t after Daniel, but after her. Perhaps Amber, but honestly, no one cares about this storyline. NO ONE. Unless it’s that hot piece of man meat Deacon Sharpe that’s behind all of this. Then I might give this story line more than a passing glance.

Michael was doing what he’s best at, getting his family members out of jail. And Heather was doing what she’s best at, being a nitwit. Michael asked Heather to drop the charges against Jana, but as usual, Heather was a bitch, and told him no. In Heather’s defense, it’s hard out there when your man is being with another man. I’m just saying.

At Ye Olde Newman Ranch…

Heather really likes getting doors slammed in her face. She went over to the Ranch to visit her boo, and this one time, Victor took pity on her, and let her inside. Yay Heather!

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Does anyone really care what these two said?

The doctor came over and examined Adam. Adam really has Hope’s eye disease y’all! He’s going blind for real. TGVN still let Adam know that if he ever finds out that he’s faking, there WILL be consequences and repercussions. Watch out Adam!

And to top it all off, Adam has the nerve to cry on Ashley’s shoulder. Adam, you’re a bad, bad, boy. You better hope TGVN never finds out about this (you know he will though, and I’ve already got my popcorn popped).

Next on the Young and the Restless…