Y&R Recap. Monday, June 15th 2009

We open up to Kate who is on Lesson #10 of her, “How to Stalk Men and Lose Your Dignity” course. Lesson 10: “Smart girls make things happen.” She tells Dee that after her little stalking session, she found out that Mac was as hung up on Billy as he was on her back in high school. No … really? She tells Baby D, that it’s too bad for nuMac that he’s all theirs and nuMac can’t have him!

NuMac has other ideas if her lips attached to Billy’s is any indication. Their make out session, however, doesn’t seem to be going as planned…

First he tries to get her up on top of the bar but it is such a fail that he has to make due with the bar stool. The failure continues when neither of the two can get him out of his shirt:

Next time Liam, get one size larger, mmkay?

Suddenly there’s a knock at the door. It’s ROWL and he’s looking for nuMac. The two button up and nuMac goes to open the door. Rowl races in and hugs her in relief. Pulling away, he notices a guilty looking Billy and asks why Billy’s there but since Billy can’t say he was trying to sleep with Raul’s fiance he just books it right out of there.

Once he’s gone nuMac wants to know what Rowl’s doing there. Couldn’t he see that she was in the middle of getting her umm, mack on? (Wah-wah-waaaah. I truly apologize for that joke.) He tells her that Kate called him in Washington claiming that nuMac needed him and so he raced right over! Hold up. Kate managed to get Rowl’s contact information, called him up and he just hopped on a plane to see what was up? Really? Raul, you know I like you but you ever heard of a telephone? E-mail? Carrier pigeon?

NuMac tells him that she’s glad that he’s there because they “need to talk”. They talk about the Darfur days and he tells her that she got him through it all and that he had no choice but to love her and while her hair slowly begins to eat her face, she tells him how weird it is to be back in GC.

Half the things she does doesn’t make any sense to her and wouldn’t to him either. Like the shirt she’s wearing for instance … he doesn’t want to know how much thought she put into it. Rowl doesn’t really know what she’s going on about and gets right to the point: Does she love him or not? She tells him that she does so they pack up their stuff, steal Baby Dee and run away to Washington … Yeah, I made that last part up, whatever.

Meanwhile, Kate’s over at the pool house trying to get some action. Billy walks in, wanting to know what she’s doing there and why she’s dressed like Amber on a good day.

She prattles on about being there for baby Dee’s hat and tells an expressionless Billy that she doesn’t like these awkward run-ins by the bed where they used to *cough* “make love”. She asks what happened with Mac and when he tells her that Rowl showed up, she commiserates with him. Realizing how ridiculous the situation is she makes to leave but just as she envisioned in her fantasy, Billy calls her back because he’s still hot and bothered from his run-in with nuMac and Kate’s better than his hand, right?

She’s all, “I’m not a consolation prize” as he kisses her but he ignores her because of course she is. As they’re getting friendlier on the bed, Billy suddenly realizes that self-loving might be the best way to go. He pulls away and Kate demands why he stopped. Suddenly she realizes the truth; he can’t make love to her because of nuMac.

Billy having never been in a situation where he had to turn down free sex before doesn’t know what to say so he hits her with a “You’re a great girl, okay?” Which in the “He Doesn’t Want You” Dictionary is somewhere between, “You have a nice personality” and “You remind me of my sister Janet.” Kate’s all, “Oh no you didn’t.” She is not just a girl! She is his wife! He tells her that the situation isn’t easy for him either but Kate doesn’t care. She’s officially done with him and she throws down her wedding ring to prove it. She is done. D-U-N. Done.

Until next week.

Now on to some MJ awesomeness. MJ and Jack are at Red’s house. She calls him out on his “urgent business” excuse and tells him that it isn’t necessary to lie to her. It’s not as if she’s going to boil his bunny or anything. MJ? Taxidermy Kitty disagrees. After Summer plays with her daddy for a little bit Red walks in and MJ leaves. Red grins and tells Jack that Mary Jane is a Keeper: With a capital K.

They briefly discuss Sharin & Niclueless before Red steers the conversation back to MJ and how good she is for Jack. He calls her an “interesting lady” and Red’s all, “Umm, you don’t call a woman who you’ve seen naked interesting.” Note: In the “He Doesn’t Want You” Dictionary, “She’s an interesting lady” can be found somewhere between: “I’d rather have sex with myself” and “You’re a great girl.”

Jackie tells her that he and MJ aren’t serious and that’s how they want it. Didn’t MJ initially lie to him about being married so that he wouldn’t come on to her? Red disagrees. She’s sure MJ’s into him and she doesn’t think that’s a bad thing. Jack tells her that his affections are elsewhere and Red notes that hers are too and they clink their glasses in a silent toast to their lameness.

Over at the GCAC, Dr. Taylor’s meeting with Ash & TGVN. Liv walks over to the table and gushes excitedly when she sees the doctor. Aware of his stellar reputation, she tells the Mustache & Ashley that Ash couldn’t be in better hands. Her complimentary, ass kissing behaviour confirms Dr. Taylor’s legitimacy to TGVN and he gives Dr. Taylor his seal of approval. When will these people ever learn that you can’t trust a woman with a rat on her head? Relieved that he just dodged a bullet Taylor heads off as MJ walks into the club. Seeing her, TGVN excuses himself so that he and MJ can have a little chat. While he’s gone, Liv and Ash make up.

Upstairs, MJ and Kitty don’t have much time to have their girl talk when the Mustache appears at her door. She explains that while she knows she was supposed to leave, since the situation has changed (Sharin & Nick are now together), she feels that with time she can win Jack over. The Mustache tells her that he’ll give her time but only if she fixes the Paul restraining order situation.

As he’s getting up to leave MJ wants to know what happens next and the Mustache’s response is something like this:


MJ takes this non-response as a positive and runs to share the good news with Kitty.

Next on Y&R: Paul actually does some investigative work for a change, Victor talks to Nick about Sharin’s baby and…