Never fear though, Noah put on his best ‘You Got That!’ face, and prepared to defend his mother’s ‘honor.’ FYI Noah, why don’t you put in a call to Maury for moms. She’s gonna need it. Noah is getting ready to throw down, but Eden on the other hand is like, “Dude, your mom’s a ho. Don’t be mad.”

Now that the after school special is over, we’ve got another commercial break sponsored by that trusty diversity campaign, this time featuring LaShawn, and LeSean…

Over at Newman Enterprises…

After seeing those looks her husband was throwing Colleen’s way, Vikki N. thought she’d pull a Phyllis, and distract Jeffrey Todd Newman with sex.

It ain’t working though…

As soon as Jeffrey Todd Newman could get away from his minder, he was back to sniffing around Colleen. Seems like MAB isn’t the only one who’s all about revisiting history.

At the Newman board meeting, Colleen was doing her best parrot impression by repeating all the facts that Uncle Jackie fed her. Y’all know I love those reaction shots, so let’s see how the crowd is feeling Power! Suit Colleen…

I think Colleen’s stint as board member is getting a better reaction than Adam’s stint as author.

Like her father, Vikki N. is not amused with Power! Suit Colleen. First CC is making moves on her man, now she’s making moves on her job. Vikki N. lets it be known that Jeffrey Todd Newman and that fragrance expansion, are not up for grabs. Power! Suit Colleen merely replies, “Bring it, bitch!”

Vikki N’s not the only one drawing lines in the sand. Neil lets Big Daddy Victor know they hey, he’s not the only that can snag a pretty young thang. Now that Neil is free of the ball and chain, and has himself a side piece, he ain’t taking orders from no one. That includes Big Daddy. Again, Big Daddy is not amused. But assuming that Neil will probably come back to the fold like he’s done every time before, Big Daddy let nuBig Daddy go. This time, I think the joke might be on you Victor.

At the Abbott Mansion…

Obviously Jackie just has a thing for nutty women. Let’s take a brief look at his history: Patty Williams(!), Diane Jenkins, Mary Jo Mason, Phyllis Summers, Sharin Newman/Abbott, and now, Mary Jane(!). One of these women seems exactly like the other. Hmmm…

She might be a nut, but Mary Jane and Jack have a lot in common. Neither of them is above using what they’ve got to get what they need. What better way is there to redeem Jack’s image, than to use Baby D? It’s not like anyone else is using her to their advantage (yes, Kate Valentine, I’m looking at you).

See, Jack loves Baby D. Just as much as her ‘daddy’…

Liam is finally back at work and in a suit. But he’s telling mommy dearest that Jack might be using him and Baby D. You think? Liam, I need you to do better. Liam’s not as dumb as he looks, though, because he tells mommy dearest that he’s looking for a new job. Good looking out Liam, because you’ll need it once Jackie finds out you were sticking it to his precious Sharin.

Back to Newman Enterprises…

Now, I know I told Big Red to handle Sharin herself. But Big Red, you’re slipping. You’ve been so busy playing Susie Homemaker, that you’re slacking on your trouble making skills. Big Red, you should be ashamed, allowing yourself to get caught by security cameras. You’ve gotten away with running someone over, and setting someone on fire. Big Red, tearing up Sharin’s room should have been cake walk for you. You’ve been hanging around Niclueless too long.

Niclueless had just made his 1,274th recommitment to his marriage to Big Red, when Detective Sexual Chocolate and his little side kick came in to bust up Big Red’s victory party.

And the moment many a Shick fan has been waiting for. Big Red gets arrested. Don’t get to celebrating too soon, though. This is child’s play for Big Red. She’s done hard time before, and she can do it again. Big Red will not be defeated.

Next time on the Young and the Restless…